Truly Random Review: GTC GT2000 Wall Mounted Clock


It’s been brought to my attention that “Wolf In A Gorilla Suit” lacks focus. Asking for elaboration, I was told that blogs are meant to be focused on particular subjects on which the writer—me—has a certain grip,  knowledge and unique insight. Say, you might find blogs dedicated specifically to reviewing horror movies, pro wrestling, fantasy books, etc. and they generally stick to that one subject, rarely deviating far from it, in order to offer readers something worth their time.

My idea was that this was to be a media blog—one that would cover everything media: movies, music, video games, books, etc. Now, after this very fair and constructive criticism, I got to thinking. My conclusion was that it would take a humble, smart man to take that criticism and re-work his blog around it. However, it would take a genius to recognize an opportunity. I am a genius.

So this is the first of many Truly Random Reviews, a weekly article within this blog in which I’ll review with profound details many unassorted items you might find yourself interested in.

Though chances are you won’t.

Truly Random Review Of The Week 1: GTC GT2000 Wall Mounted Clock


I thought I’d start this series with one hell of a hook. We all use clocks in our life. Clocks tell time, and we need to be able to know time, or else we would get in all sorts of trouble; we’d be late for appointments, we’d lose track of our lives, miss dates or even die if we’re like, really, really unlucky.

With this in mind, the necessity of owning a clock is pretty obvious. Nowadays everyone carries a clock on their phone, or around their left wrist—right if you’re a redneck—but this isn’t the review of one of those travesties to chronography. Here, I’m reviewing one specific chronograph model launched in the early 2000’s by the General Time Corporation, a company with a name that makes them sound like some manner of magical ministry of time, but isn’t. They’re just a clock manufacturer (though all you clock enthusiasts already know this).

The backside, its one decent achievement.
The GT2000 is a fairly standard wall-mounted clock, which is to say it’s very mediocre. A slightly convex piece of flimsy plastic masks the white face of the chronograph. The numbers are unimaginatively spread on far edges of the face like numbers on the face of a clock, one to twelve (like I said: unimaginative and frankly boring) with four subdivisions for every number drawn as ½’’ lines, functioning as the minute markers between each hour. Nothing impressive going on here.

It also has the words “MADE IN U.S.A.” tackily printed at the bottom under the “6”, taking away any semblance of elegance the clock was aspiring to.

There are, big surprise, three hands that function as the obvious hour, minute and second dials. The hour and minute hands are equally thick at about ¾’’ while the second hand looks thin and hard to see. The hour hand is slightly shorter than the rest. It's like GTC was not even trying to break any ground or push the envelope.

On the back of the GT2000, we see the black plastic structure with three tiny pillars, one of which is meant to be used as an archaic support mechanism to mount it on the wall using any sized nail, and two of which have absolutely no structural purpose but to be an eyesore. It runs on one AA battery and has a remarkably long battery life. The knob with which you set the time is also black plastic, but has the very charming tiny etching of a clock on it. Good job here, but hardly makes up for the rest.
The pompous asshole at work.

As for its precision, I set it to the atomic clock of the NIST & UNO and after a week noticed a very conspicuous shift in about 1.4 billion nanoseconds. This is a catastrophe for anyone who wants a truly precise chronograph. It’s also remarkably noisy thanks to the antiquated motor it boasts. If your chronograph is going to stick to the "tick tock" standard, at least give us a sight to make up for it.

In the end what bothered me about the GT2000 is that it doesn't seem to be trying to be anything else than a simple, easy-to-read clock. It doesn't care, and ultimately gives this pompous, smug idea that imposes upon itself.

Should I Buy It? Where Can I Find It?


The GT2000 used to be a mainstream wall mounted chronograph in the last decade, but has now become an underground item, one very hard to find in the wild. You might find it if you look hard enough in eBay or CraigsList, but don’t hold your breath. The truth is there are better things to mount on your wall so you can tell time. The GT2000 is simple but mediocre and not very precise.


 

Score: 2 out of 5 Windows Hourglasses.
Don't take your TIME to skip this purchase.
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About The Damn Beast

Pre-op trans-minotaur, sci-fi/fantasy/horror author, metal singer, videogame journalist, pop culture blogger. I also lift heavy things and put them down again repeatedly to occupy more space.
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