Ranking: The Marvel Cinematic Universe

This ranking contains spoilers of the entire MCU, including the recently released Ant-Man.



The ant is out of the colony and now that Paul Rudd has astonished us with his marvelous performance as Ant Man, Phase 2 of the Marvel Cinematic Universe is over. What does that mean for us folks living and loving on the Internet? It is the time for lists and rankings and since I believe I have more Vision than Paul Bettany I might as well start.

I love the MCU there is not a single movie I dislike; this was a hard, difficult and painful job to do [Editor's Note: Hah hah, that was the plan] but someone had to do it, and that someone is every geek on the Internet with access to a blog, so here it is:

THE GAME_BRAINS ULTIMATE MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE RANKING FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE AWESOME AND LIKE TO READ OTHER AWESOME PEOPLE, OR GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP for short.


GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 12: The Incredible Hulk

You know how in every redneck family everyone is getting drunk, having fun and sleeping with their cousins, but there is always this one guy who wants to go to "College" and demands to be taken seriously? For me, that is The Incredible Hulk of the MCU family.

Iron Man gave Marvel its winning formula: Action + Comedy = Success. The Incredible Hulk forgot about the comedy part, so it's a movie that wants to be taken seriously. It does have one or two jokes but in general the movie tries to set up some super cereal emotional stakes for Banner that in the end do not pay out.

It could be forgiven by the fact that this was Marvel Studios second movie and maybe the fact that it kindda flopped (55 Million opening weekend) taught Marvel the lesson to not stray out of their formula.

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GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 9: Thor/Thor: The Dark World/ Capitan America: The First Avenger

I swear to you guys I was really trying to stick to this whole "List" thing but when trying to decide No. 11 I just could not make a choice between these three movies.

Also, they are tied on No. 9 and not No.11 because all of them are great movies so if you don't mind (and I know you don't because you are super cool and handsome/pretty), I´m just gonna list what I liked or disliked of each movie. 

http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/11112/111125902/3357028-0692262876-thor-.jpg 

Thor was Marvel's first big risk; you have to thank Thor for Guardians of the Galaxy.

Before Thor all the MCU movies had been grounded in reality, but this movie gave us a high fantasy setting that dared to be bright and pretty when all the other fantasy movies went all dark and grim. And of course: Loki.

The only thing in the movie that didn't do it for me? Thor & Jane's romance. They just fell madly in love after a weekend together? This is a worse love story than [2007 joke edited out in a fit of rage].

http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20150301114554/avengers/de/images/9/90/Thor-the-dark-world-thor-and-loki-chris-hemsworth-tom-hiddleston.jpg

Thor: The Dark World made Asgard a little bit more Game of Thrones and a little less pretty and shiny but I guess that was kinda expected when they announced Alan Taylor would direct (the guy directed some Game of Thrones episodes). While that was a mild bummer, it was more than made up by showing us Thor & Loki working together. I can't wait to see how Thor will react when he discovers Loki is not only alive but holding the throne of Asgard.

That is a great way to setup the stakes for Thor: Ragnarok and because of that I award Thor: The Dark World with the GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP Vision Award:



Captain America: The First Avenger is a great movie and it was the first time that the MCU truly felt like a connected universe. Chris Evans and Hugo Weaving do a great job as their respective characters. With Capitan America Marvel gave us our first truly heroic character: one that does the right thing becuase it is the right thing to do and one that his emotional shit together.

One last reason to love this movie: Peggy Carter and Howard Stark.

The reason it ranks at No. 9 and not higher is because the movie is a slow burner, the action starts way too late in the movie and most of it happens in montages.

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 GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 8: Iron Man 2

This movie get a lot of shit  and I seriously don't understand why. It gives Tony a great character arc through one simple question: how much is left of Tony after he becomes Iron Man?

Iron Man 2 is all about deconstructing the Tony/Iron Man relationship and after the attack on Monaco where he feels vulnerable for the first time since donning the suit, he is unable to get back to his hero persona until he reconciles his both identities. That for me is a great character arc. Oh, we get our first look at Nick Fury on an actual movie, and of course Black Widow. Also let's not forget Sam Rockwell, who kicks some serious ass.

This was also the first time that the MCU started exploring the theme of the unwanted consequences of heroism, through the character of Ivan Vanko and his life story, a theme Marvel would later explore on Daredevil, Agents of SHIELD, and of course in the upcoming Civil War.

Just to piss off the haters I'm giving this movie four GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP Vision Awards:


http://www.themoviethemesong.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Iron-Man-Movie-Theme-Song-2.jpg


GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 7: Iron Man

The story of a man who comes to terms with the unwanted consequences of his actions.

Because of his immense ego Tony Stark decides he and only he will carry the burden of responsibility for all the evil that Stark Industries has brought to the world and to help carry the load he creates the Iron Man suit.

This movie was the one who started it all but what makes it stand out to this day is that rather than being occupied with establishing universe it was first and foremost occupied with being a great movie, a lesson some other cinematic universes have yet to learn.

For being the one that established the MCU, Iron Man gets the elusive Full Vision award



That should raise Tony's ego.





 GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 6: Age of Ultron

This movie delivered and that's it. The main reason why this movie did not blow my brains is that it felt inconsequential. Of course I do now that what happened in Sokovia will form the basis of the conflict on Civil War and yet I felt not a single character had an arc.

My girlfriend later pointed out that maybe the point of an Avengers movie is to see the development of the team rather than that of the characters and that is exactly what happens in this movie. You see them argue because of who they and you see how the character arcs of their individual movies affect the team dynamic, but not a single Avenger has any significant growth through Age of Ultron's runtime.

Whereas Avengers was all about setting up the team, in Age of Ultron they work like a well oiled machine and that is a sight to see. The inclusion of Scarlet Witch, Quicksilver and Vision was visually refreshing since they are the only characters with powers of the non punching variety.

Avengers felt like a perfect movie, Age of Ultron feels rushed, like there are some missing parts. I for one, can´t wait to get my hands on the Director's Cut.


 GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No.5: Ant-Man

The latest and maybe one of the greatest: Ant-Man proves that Marvel understands and has perfected its formula.

The fight with Falcon is one of the best MCU ties I have seen in a Marvel movie, Luis seriously steals the show and he should be hanging out in every MCU movie. Oh, and Yellowjacket is one of the coolest looking Marvel villains ever.

A heist movie that by chance is about a man that can go tiny. This is what The Incredible Hulk failed to do: a super hero movie where the stakes are personal/emotional. 

There is literally nothing negative to say about this movie. 

I am not joking when I say this was my reaction to the Tank bursting out of the building.


 GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 4: Iron Man 3

Iron Man is about building the character of Iron Man, Iron Man 2 is about re-conciliating Iron Man with Tony, Avengers is the culmination of that character arch through Tony's act of self sacrifice and Iron Man 3 asks the question: Who is Tony without the suit?

After the battle of New York Tony is as vulnerable as ever. Add to that some serious PTSD and then subtract the suit, what do we have left? Tony Stark, not Iron Man, as the hero.



GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 3: Capitan America: The Winter Soldier

This movie destroyed S.H.I.E.L.D. I have never seen something as ballsy as this in my time as a geek. It was tremendous for so many reasons. It added another layer to the previous MCU movies while also destroying the one thing that was binding the whole universe together.

All of this while also telling a deep, personal and emotional story. Cap does not want to let go of Bucky, not only because he always sees the best of people, but also with Peggy suffering from alzheimer, Bucky is the only thing that remains of his old life. Add the fact that after the PRISM/NSA espionage scandal this story was telling a very topical/political story, through a superhero spy thriller.

I like it when my entertainment has balls [Editor's Note: can confirm; I've seen the magazines he collects] and I can't think of any movie ballsier than Winter Soldier.

Also, it totally gave new to life to Agents of Shield.  

For changing the whole status quo of the MCU this movie gets five GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP awards:


GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 2: The Avengers

The wait was long but the pay off was perfect. Just like with Ant-Man there is literally nothing negative I could say of this movie. The dialogue, the character dynamics, the perfect villain that plays everyone masterfully (to the point where maybe losing in the end was intentional), the final reveal of Thanos, the action scenes, just about everything in this movie overwhelms me with joy.

Lines like: "There is only one God and I'm sure as hell he doesn't dress like that", "Doth your mother knoweth you weraeth her drapes?" and the one shot of all the Avengers in action it just makes me giggle like a baby every time. It had the perfect mix of action, drama and comedy.


GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP No. 1: Guardians of the Galaxy.

Guardians of the Galaxy has the exact same character arqetypes thas Avengers and a similar storyline.

But in Space.

I need not give any more arguments.

For having the vision of doing exactly what The Avengers did just better and in space I am giving this movie the highest honor I have to give: the GBUMCURFPWAAALTROAP Sexy Paul Bettany award:

http://www.pikosky.sk/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/PB2.jpg
Enjoy, James Gunn.
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About Game_Brains

I make videogames. Superhero culture is the closest thing I have to a religion. Hopefully one day I will explore space, but meanwhile I´m happy replaying Mass Effect. I seriously want to achieve immortality, not joking on this one. My self appointed mission in life is to make the world a happier place. I´m a walking and talking self help book, also, I TOTALLY BELIEVE IN YOU.
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